Encircle Your Daughters: The HPV Vaccination
September 28, 2011
Sonja Eddings Brown is the President of The Kitchen Cabinet, a mother of a 14-year old daughter, and the co-founder of Granada Hills Charter High School, the largest charter school in America serving 4000 students.
Should you give your teen-age daughter the HPV inoculation? The government shouldn’t be mandating it to be sure. But parents today almost have to consider vaccinating their daughters EVEN if they are not sexually-active, simply because their future dates or future mates might have been exposed or not be forthcoming.
Understandably, caring parents are more confused than ever. The recent GOP presidential debates addressing the subject stirred up questions, but didn’t offer any real clarity on the subject. There is only one thing parents like me
know for sure. Our teen-age daughters are growing up in a world where we feel less and less able to protect them. It is a new time, and it is more important than ever that we encircle our daughters.
As a school board president in Los Angeles, I have had a front seat to the changing landscape for teens. The threats to our sons and daughters in this age are often inconceivable to parents. After decades of experimental and casual sex, blood coursing through the veins of many Americans is tainted. Just note how specific the Red Cross or a hospital must be before accepting a blood donor. It is actually trendy on our high school campuses for girls to experiment with bisexuality. The majority of teens consider oral sex to be nothing more than “kissing.” National statistics from the Kaiser Health 
Foundation indicate that 1 in 10 teen age girls between 15 and 19 state that they have experienced violence or been “forced” to have sex against their will at least once, 1 in 5 have had oral sex, and 25% of all girls say their relationships “are moving too fast.” Approximately 30% of girls and boys report they have had multiple partners.
Between their peers, the dangerous influence of the internet, and the media introducing sexuality earlier and earlier, girls are being pressured from all sides. It is these very realities that spur pediatricians and gynecologists to encourage parents to have their daughters vaccinated for HPV. The vaccine has been developed to protect girls who ARE sexually active from contracting viruses that can cause cervical cancer. The vaccine is also needs to be considered for protecting girls who aren’t sexually-active. National statistics indicate that there is at least a 50/50 chance that our kids will likely marry someone who has had sex before, could have been exposed to or infected with a sexually-transmitted virus or other disease , and in some cases may not even know it.
As concerned parents we should inform ourselves about the risks vs. benefits for our own teens.
About 18 months ago, a 15-year old California girl in the Los Angeles Unified School District went for a sleep over at a friend’s house with the full knowledge of her parents. She promised to stay put, but her true intention was to be included in a nearby party of school acquaintances. Unbeknownst to this teenaged girl and her accompanying friend, the gathering was actually a “Virginity Party.” Her drink was drugged and she became the subject of a gang rape in an upstairs bedroom while the hosting parents sat downstairs watching TV, completely unaware.
The 15-year old girl was horrifically mistreated. Only partially drugged, she was raped, sodomized, and ultimately left on the street to call her parents. The beautiful young teen would never be the same. When charges were filed against the boys who assaulted her, the girl was
ridiculed at school and further tormented. She ended up leaving school, leaving her family, and being institutionalized for a year. To date, the boys involved in the crime have been charged, but not jailed.
Parents need to know that such parties and outcomes are simply not that rare today, and that “parties” among high school and college youth are one of the most dangerous destinations for your daughters. There are many innocent settings which can become opportunities for life-altering experiences, and only by being vigilant can parents both prepare and protect their kids.
Encircle your daughters. Their bodies are sacred and special, and every girl in America deserves to think so. Don’t be afraid to say “No” when you don’t know friends, or the parents of friends. It’s a good idea to consult with your doctor about the HPV vaccine, but while you think it over, make sure that you are connected to your daughter’s world. If you’re paying for her cell phone, check it once in awhile. Invite her to have Friday nights at YOUR house, and open your wallet to make it attractive. And make bedtime a time not for lectures, but for getting to know one of the most important people in your life.
-Sonja Eddings Brown, President, The Kitchen Cabinet
Follow @TKC_US
My pediatrician advised me to give the vaccine to my 10 YEAR OLD SON. Yes, I said SON. And I also said no.
I would never have had my 4 daughters imminized with the HPV vaccine. They were taught from the time they were small that their bodies are special and sacred and to save themselves for marriage. There was no thought of “oh well, they are going to be sexually active eventually, so let’s give them the Pill and vaccinate them so at least they are safe when they are having sex with multiple partners.” And people wonder why our morals have fallen so low and so far.
This is a matter best left up to parents whose teachings and standards may be a lot higher than schools, and government policy makers.
Lori: What a committed Mom you are. Every girl in America should feel, and should know that her body is sacred. Our economy would change overnight if we could teach young women to be sexually responsible and bring children into prepared homes. Every parent needs to inform themselves about the HPV vaccine and decide what their personal judgment is on inoculating. In the meantime, there is nothing more important than being proactive mothers, talking to and informing our daughters, and setting good examples for all the girls who are looking for them.